Play, you deserve too

After my lockdown year from covid & doing a spiral sessions then weaving myself back into work I thought I would write something that a lot of people don't realise or acknowledge for reasons they're holding themselves back from being there true selves, hiding behind a mask and not allowing themselves to be seen

Inner child work

Inner child work is the process of contacting, understanding, embracing, and healing your inner child. Your inner child represents your first original self that entered into this world; it contains your capacity to experience wonder, joy, innocence, sensitivity, and playfulness Not everyone associates childhood with playfulness and fun, though. If you experienced neglect, trauma, or other emotional pain, your inner child might seem small, vulnerable, and in need of protection. You may have buried this pain deep to hide it and protect yourself — both your present self and the child you once were. Hiding pain doesn’t heal it.

Instead, it often surfaces in your adult life, showing up as distress in personal relationships or difficulty meeting your own needs. Working to heal your inner child can help you address some of these issues To begin healing, you first have to acknowledge your inner child’s presence How do you know if your past trauma is affecting you deeply right now? Is it connected to your inner child Examples....

Being hit or smacked by your parents/grandparents

Having an emotionally unavailable parent who withholds affection

Being “punished” by kicking, shaking, biting, burning, hair pulling, pinching, scratching or “washing out the mouth” with soap

Being the recipient of molestation, shown pornography, or any other type of sexual contact from a parent, relative or friend

Being the child of divorce

Being given inappropriate or burdensome responsibilities (such as caring for your parents)

Not being fed or provided a safe place to live from your parents

Abandonment (your caretakers leaving you alone for long periods of time without a babysitter)

Emotional neglect, i.e. not being nurtured, encouraged or supported

Being deliberately called names or verbally insulted

Denigration of your personality

Destruction of personal belongings

Excessive demands

Humiliation

Car accidents, or other spontaneous traumatic events

Let's sit for a moment after that, let's breathe in some love and let's hug ourselves. There are many more examples of childhood trauma, but I just wanted to provide you with a few to give you an idea of what inner child work deals with.

It’s also important to remember that our parents weren’t the only ones responsible for provoking childhood trauma — our grandparents, brothers, sisters, extended family members, family friends, and childhood friends may have also played a part Your inner child is sensitive and vulnerable. It’s important to pay attention to your inner child’s fears and insecurities as well as the joys and feelings of wonder that often come up when connecting with your inner child.

Throughout the day, check-in with yourself and ask, “how am I feeling right now?” In order to remove the guilt, shame, fear, hatred, self-loathing and anger that we carry with us, we have to heal the child within. To do this, we must earn the trust of our inner child through love and self-nurturing Some self-nurturing things you could say to your inner child include, for example: I love you. I hear you. I’m sorry. Thank you. I forgive you.

Make a habit of talking to your inner child. You could also communicate through journal work by asking your inner child a question, then writing down the response Over time you will learn to be the caring parent that this child never had. You will share your future with the wonderful, free, and loving spirit that is your original inner child

Allow yourself to be a child. Love her or him they deserve it as much as you do